a better me

• spinach leaves with oil/vinegar, chick peas, shredded cheese, croutons 
• mixed melons 
• water

a really have been going crazy these past few days. thursday night i had a huge panic attack/mental breakdown to my really close friend and my boyfriend and my roommate. it was really hard and after that i sorta stopped working out (i did on thursday but not fri, sat, sun, or mon). i also ate a bunch of junk food last night, like too much to even post about cause i’m ashamed. i’ve been straying from the diet, not horribly, but definitely. it could be a lot worse but i don’t really know what else to do. stress is a huge part and yeah, it’s life. i’m trying to not feel guilty or bad about any of this and just move on and start doing better. maybe i was setting my goals too high and pushing myself too hard. i literally was eating no junk food and eating food that i sometimes didn’t enjoy and all of that. it’s a lot harder than i thought it was going to be. i was going strong for like 2 or 3 weeks and then hit a patch. but i’m still here and still trying, i promise. 

breakfast

• small raisin cinnamon muffin
• chobani non fat strawberry greek yogurt

lunch

• diet iced tea with lemon flavoring (this is weird cause i usually only drink water)
• chicken caesar salad 230 calories 

• breakfast - special k granola strawberry, 90 calories
• lunch - cheese quesadilla, cheddar and tortilla heated up. lettuce, sour cream, and fresh chunky salsa. 
• snack - lightly salted peanuts 
• exercise - run/walk alternating on track for like 6 minutes. stair master intervals setting for 22 mins.

lunch: turkey bacon on a wheat wrap with lettuce and pepperjack cheese. i dipped this in ranch occasionally but got it on the side so i didn’t use as much! also got pretzels on the side, but only ate a few of them

dinner: caesar salad that was 230 calories. mini “tray” of slice green apples and caramel dip, cheddar cheese chunks - 140 calories.

snacks: i ate a small amount of kettle corn and banana chips during a movie 

• special k 90 calorie strawberry granola bar
• walk, run, walk on the actual track
• 20 mins on stairstepper, alternating paces and stepping styles 
• 15 mins of ab and butt oriented pilates 

• salad - oil and vinegar, romaine lettuce and spinach leaves, 2 hard boiled eggs, shredded carrots, shredded cheese, chick peas, black olives
• a slice of wheat bread with butter
• fruit - all mixed melons 
• a TINY bowl (like a few bites) of cream of broccoli soup and it was ehhh

• salad - romaine lettuce, spinach leaves, oil/vinegar, 2 hard boiled eggs, carrots, chick peas, shredded cheese, broken up pita chips
• fruit - honey dew, pineapple, cantaloupe 
• bagel - cinnamon raisin, 1 half peanut butter 1 half cream cheese

i got really busy last night and didn’t update this. also went on a late night adventure ;) with my boyfriend (i’m talking 4 am) and got fast food for the first time in WEEKS. mcdonalds. 1 mcchicken and 1 mcdouble. totally cheated, but i was munchin’ hard… and it was such a good time. i know :( 

• caramelized onion and swiss chicken burger on white bun with a tiny bit of ketchup, mayo, lettuce
• glass of milk
• banana with a tiny bit of nutella 

breakfast

• 2 over easy large eggs
• wheat english muffin
• orange
• glass of fat free skim milk

lunch 

• 6 inch sub. wheat bread, turkey, provolone, mayo, black olives, lettuce (didn’t eat the entire thing at all. it tasted weird cause i accidentally got ketchup)
• grilled/marinated chicken breast on wheat english muffin. spinach, light ranch, slice of pepperjack cheese

dinner

• 4 slices of mini homemade pizza with olives and pepperoni 
• also random snacks - cookie crisp, popcorn at a movie theater, a drumstick (i sorta cheated and went crazy here and it was bad)